Long Tale Press

Chaos_reigns says, in his review:

You have good descriptions, but you go to far with them. you can just meander off and leave the reader hanging, because the reader will get bored and leave. the first few pages are important, you have to grab thier attention and cater to their interest. And most people who read books don't care about the ins and outs of a catfish. They will go to the store pick it up, start reading through it a little bit, and get bored and put it back. The only thing that might catch anyone's interest is the fat lady, but then you move on to something else.

I agree with the general sentiment here about catching people's interest, but I disagree that there's a problem in this excerpt with it.

I mean for goodness sakes, it starts off with a dead body in the river and a character named Pooch Eye! The reader isn't going to forget the body, and they're sure as heck going to want to know more about anybody with a name like that, and how on earth the body "cost him" the fish. That is a fabulous opening line because it raises a whole BUNCH of great questions in the reader's mind. They're going to read at least a page or two to see how those questions get answered. The question about why there's a body in the river might, conceivably not get answered until the end of the book. But the question about who Pooch Eye is and how the dead woman cost him the fish do get answered by the end of the short first chapter.

John thus sets up the reader with three great questions, answers two of them to give the reader some reward for getting to the end of chapter 1, but doesn't answer everything so they'll stay motivated to keep reading on.Show spoiler

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